• This is seriously the name of your cookbook?
• She was born to be a lawyer.
• Hilarious rant by anomous blogger.
• After you stop laughing you realize this is gross.
• How to give somone’s computer tourettes.

• Stop comparing Linux to Windows. The goal is not to create a Windows clone. That’s a terrible idea. We need to push Linux further from Windows.
• The NBA referees need to be fined for every bad call. This is part 2 of the rule that instant replay cameras must be installed and utilized. It works in football. The fans won’t mind longer games if they are called correctly.
• Election ‘08 is boring. It’s the same rhetoric over and over again. The next debates should happen American Gladiator style.
• NBC and Fox have accepted the digital age of media distribution. They just released hulu.com. Episodes — old and new — of Fox and NBC TV shows are available for free. The music industry needs to figure this out. Suing everyone is not going to work. Deal with it.
• The Patriots must not lose a game. At 11 - 0,  I now demand they have a perfect season. Do it.
• The Producers must make a deal with the Writers. It’s a boring strike. Unless you decide to duke it out, American Gladiator style, go back to work already.
• Someone has to step up and take on James Randi. The JREF is offering one million dollars to anyone who can prove they have paranormal abilities. No magic tricks. It must be proven, to defy scientific law. Randi has proven the money is there. Someone must step. It also must be televised.
• I must take a vacation. NY? Vegas? Hawaii? Cabo?

• Work, Work, Work, Lakers Game, Work, Work, Work and Work
• You’re kidding, right?
• Is Bill Maher coming back or do I need to implement some new rules?
• The Season Finale of Weeds was terrible.
• Shit, you aren’t kidding. Oh shit, this is phuked!

Kobe, you were perfect from the line all night. You actually got the seldom called, 3-point foul. It was questionable, and they still gave it to you.

You make the first two. Your stance was awkward. As the pressure was visibly affecting you, we could hear your heart beating.

The regulars knew to send waves of “shhhh” to those chanting MVP. You tend to miss the louder the MVP chants become.

Practically standing sideways, you miss the 3rd. I saw that happening.

What a let down.

 3.3 seconds left, and they can’t get you the ball.

You were a diversion. Sean Williams is much smaller than Bynum. Drew was on his game. He could have caught it, dunked it and tied it. How did we (proverbially) go from 7 -3 to 7 -6 so quickly?

How can the momentum pendulum swing so fast?

How can we not beat the Nets, the worst offensive team in the league (currently), at home?

How can we let them drop 102?

Especially….since I was there, in sec 112.  

Radmanovic, you are the phuking worst.

Seriously, you are terrible. You had 1 point tonight, yet the game winning shot…attempt.

The Lakers are too frustrating. I don’t know if I can deal with it this year.

I didn’t sign up for this.

Dallas Fort Worth Airport  - November 21st, 2007 4:15pm CST

• Going to the Lake show on Sunday and Tuesday
• The Boston Celtics are like the NBA version of the Harlem Globetrotters. It’s not fair.
• I’ll reiterate it, all programmers are douche bags!
• Prioritize, Focus, Complete!
• What you know bout me?

“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn’t work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”

-Emo Philips

transcend  - verb

1. to rise above or go beyond; overpass; exceed: to transcend the limits of thought; kindness transcends courtesy.
2. to outdo or exceed in excellence, elevation, extent, degree, etc.; surpass; excel.

• Lakers are over .500 while the Heat just won their first game
• Time for Texas. For the Lakes and for me.
• What happened to Peyton Manning? 6 interceptions. D00de!
• James Randi is my hero. More people need to call bullshit when they see it.
• TMZ stands for Thirty Mile Zone. It was a nickname in the 60s for all of the shooting locations surrounding Hollywood. Now you know. Big up, SAG for asking the question.

This is the most disgusting yet fascinating thing I have seen on the interwebs. It came from the smoking gun so I trust it’s authenticity. As of Friday, Snopes was claiming this was unverified. As of now, Snopes has this listed as false. Who should I believe? I have to go with smoking gun, cause it’s much more fun to think there are kids passing out from the smell of their own fermented shit…and then wake up talking to dead people.

Jenkem aka Butthash, is produced by placing fecal matter inside a bottle. A balloon is placed on the top of the bottle and is placed in direct sunlight. After a few days of baking, fermentation occurs and causes the balloon to fill with a toxic gas. When the gas is inhaled, the user will pass out and wake up to a euphoria similar to cocaine with hallucinations as powerful as LSD and the smell of shit on their upper lip for days.

I don’t want to sound like an old man screaming about those crazy kids, but what happened to snorting cocaine to achieve a cocaine high? Call me old fashioned, but I miss the good ol days. What am I saying?! No I don’t — this is awesome! The amount of bad jokes this has provided is endless. It definitely changes the meaning of “having the bomb shit.”  

“For only a dollar a day, kids can get high on real drugs, please help.”

If these kids want to inhale their own fermented shit, it’s their right. I just really hope they make the Darwin awards before they can reproduce or we are headed for the bleak society depicted in Idiocracy.

• Damn Lakes! I know it doesn’t mean anything and you usually start like this. But it’s still nice to see.
• This shit is the real deal. The real sitcky icky icky.
• Mastros on Thur? For real? The reservation is set.
• Thanks for coming to Mexico, Tim Riggins. You’re a good friend, Tim Riggins.
• Donde esta El Diablo?

It’s finally here! The long awaited, overly-hyped Part 2 of the epic saga, I Need Money! Enjoy and yes…I know about the sound…