2011 Troll Awards
2011 has been the year of the Troll. We live in a world where information truly travels at the speed of light. Unfortunately deliberate misinformation can go viral just as quickly. Here are the nominees for the 2011 Troll of the Year Awards.
Texts From Bennett
A couple of weeks ago my facebook newsfeed was littered with posts from a tumblr blog called textsfrombennett.tumblr.com. David Sheldon, a.k.a “Mac Lethal,” proclaims “these are text messages I exchange with my 17 year old cousin Bennett. He is a white boy that thinks he’s a Crip, works at AAmco, has a girlfriend named Mercedes, and is one of the most unintentionally funny and brilliant souls on the planet.”
The blog is a truly hilarious read. As I literally laughed out loud I couldn’t help but wonder “is this real?” It’s just too perfect. Granted there could be hundreds or thousands of texts and Sheldon “Mac Lethal” is just choosing the few that are worthy of the blog.
Unfortunately The Smoking Gun has decided to proverbially call the cops and turn on the lights on this party. “Asked by TSG if his son had a 17-year-old cousin named Bennett, Sheldon’s father, also named David, laughed and said, “That’s what he says.” The elder Sheldon went on to note that his son has a friend who is prone to “Yogi Berraisms” and that he uses some of these malaprops for the “Bennett” blog. The friend’s name, he said, “has been changed to protect the innocent.”
Regardless if Bennett is a real person or a composite of several people or figments of Mac Lethal’s imagination, it’s fucking hilarious and has earned its place as a 2011 troll nominee.
Earl is in the Studio with Tyler
The disappearance of Odd Future’s Earl Sweatshirt (Thebe Kgositsile) has been a top story in hip hop for the past 18 months. The New Yorker & Complex have each ran in-depth articles on their discovery of Earl’s whereabouts. His inevitable return is just around the corner and will be a remarkable moment in hip hop when he finally joins his crew and takes the stage.
Odd Future’s comedic frontman, Tyler, the Creator thought it would be funny to tease the world with not-so-subtle tweets saying Thebe is back and in the studio with him. Twitter responded with an explosion of Earl tweets propelling #FreeEarl into a trending topic. Mega music blog Pitchfork and Complex both immediately ran stories announcing Earl’s return.
A few hours later Tyler let us in on the joke by tweeting “Thebe says I should win the award for Troll of 2011.” Yeah, we agree, Tyler. And for that you are nominated…although I personally think that was more mean than funny.
Justin Bieber Impregnated Some Chick
In terms of going viral, there is no doubt this was the biggest troll of the year. Somehow Mariah Yeater was able to convince a whole lot of people, including TMZ, CNN, The Huffington Post, MSNBC and your local news station that it was even remotely possible Justin Bieber is the father of her baby.
It’s an idea so laughable that regardless of the magnitude of its viral reach I didn’t believe it for one second. The story was so big it deserves a nomination…but not much else.
Man Gives Cheating Girlfriend a Shit Tattoo
Thanks to the Tosh.0 Blog, pretty much everyone saw this story floating around facebook. An Ohio tattoo artist, Ryan L. Fitzjerald found out that his girlfriend, Rossie Brovent is cheating and instead of breaking up with her, he literally gave her a shit tattoo. While sounding like a hilarious case of awesome revenge, something about this story stunk of “really?!” even with the photographic proof.
It has recently been debunked by our friends at The Smoking Gun and is now a nominee, and I believe a front-runner, for troll of 2011.
That Shit “Kray”
As we end 2011, there is no question the song of right now is “Niggas in Paris” by Jay-Z and Kanye West, from their collaborative album, “Watch The Throne.” The duo is at the tail end of their tour in which they perform this track 10 times, in its entirety, as an encore. That shit cray! That shit cray!
A couple of months ago it was floating around the internet that Kanye is actually saying “that shit Kray” a reference to Ronald and Reginald Kray, 1950s twin crime-lords from London. This actually makes a lot of sense and is consistent with the context of the song, and the type of wordplay Kanye is known for.
Well it turns out that Kanye had no intention of using Kray and it is just cray, a shortened version of crazy. Mia Glenn, a teenager with a tumblr completely made this up and because it adds such clever depth to the already viral phrase, it was believed by pretty much everyone. That shit troll! That shit troll!
