Jul
20I Hate Asher Roth
Hate is a pretty strong word. I fucking hate Asher Roth. Why in the world is Steve Rifkin committed to promoting a less than mediocre “college rapper?” I bet I could I walk into any college dorm and find 10 white, suburban jews with better skillz than Asher Roth. Hot Kizzle must be suicidal every time he hears this douche bag on the radio.
I watched this bumbaclot perform on Jimmy Fallon with the Roots as his backup band. Black Thought looked so bored. Asher Roth isn’t a musician. He isn’t a lyricists. He isn’t a poet. He isn’t hyphy. He’s a 22 year old douche bag that is unbelievably lucky. He is living the dream for absolutely no reason.
Now Asher is responding to beef with Spencer Pratt. Congrats, Asher. You made me side with Speidi. You aren’t just the worst “rapper” in the world, you are the worst person.
Here’s the response. Nice beat…kinda sounds like Jay Z’s DOA.
“you know I move my troops to keep trooping, we start a revolution”
Asher Che Guevara Roth…this fucking idiot is more delusional than cap and trade.
Jun
16It’s Socialism

Socialism woo hoo! Let’s hear it for .21%
Dec
02Stephen Colbert Wants to Take Kanye Down
“You’re not the voice of this generation of this decade…with all the auto tuning on your records you are barely the voice on your own albums.”
Oct
13Criss Leto Super Douche

According to my brother, the brooklyn king of space roaches, I am a super douche. I am not just any douche. I am the a combination of Criss Angel and Jared Leto. I guess I am pretty self-deprecating and masochist because I find it pretty funny. I’m pretty damn proud of it. It’s doucharific!
Update: I am now the proud owner of crissleto@super-douche.com
Sep
24David Blaine Out Douches Criss Angel
Everyone that attemps to see Douche Blaine perform his non-magic trick is upset by the fact that Blaine isn’t actually hanging there for 60 straight hours. He takes about 3 breaks per hour. This has to be the worst “trick” of all time.
David Blaine and Criss Angel need to have a douche off. They should make each other disappear, forever. Since neither one of them is an actual a magician, Angel will most likely set his hair on fire and scream into the camera, while Blaine climbs a telephone tower and stands there for 45 minutes.
The only thing these two have successfully made disappear is my love for magic. It’s a shame that Copperfield is busy coercing women to his island and is no longer interested in yearly specials.
So now we are stuck with these two. At least bring back Gob Bluth.
“These aren’t tricks, Michael…they’re ILLUSIONS!”
Twitter Feed
- WhatDaPhuk: I disassembled the tv. I removed the lamp, color wheel, & ballast board. Now I'm gonna go cry in the corner for the rest of the night.
- WhatDaPhuk: This is the worst thing since unsliced bread. #fuck #smellsLikeDeadTV
- WhatDaPhuk: My tv (samsung 50 dlp) died. This is far more traumatic than the office router.
- WhatDaPhuk: "Is she hot? Ummmm...not by any modern day standards...but maybe in Amish country, early 1700s."
- WhatDaPhuk: RT @ThatKevinSmith: Via @BerKid "have you used chat roulette?" I prefer to jerk off in private.
- WhatDaPhuk: I'm sorry it was a typo is probably not going to work for felony tax evasion
- WhatDaPhuk: The Coffee Bean barista just looked at me like I am crazy when I ordered a "coffee enema." What...they don't do that here?!
- WhatDaPhuk: The only thing better than Neyo's Closer is the Power 106 Techno Mix
- WhatDaPhuk: #JohnnyDrama http://tweetphoto.com/14053398
- WhatDaPhuk: It really is 10 to 200 degrees hotter in the valley right now.
- WhatDaPhuk: RT @LAsnark: Let's gather all our prayers and good karma together for Mommy Snark (my mom's) operation today, k? Thx.
- WhatDaPhuk: @bhead53 hells yeah. I need to find u a new profile pic.
- WhatDaPhuk: RT @SPINmagazine: Strokes confirm new album release & Lollapalooza! Details from Julian Casablancas: http://su.pr/1G0bkr
- WhatDaPhuk: Off to the valley...where's that hoe Sally? #thatGirl
- WhatDaPhuk: RT @GhostfaceKillah: Add Meth-Ghost-Rae on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Meth-Ghost-Rae/389245361180?v=wall
- WhatDaPhuk: Will someone please introduce us? http://bit.ly/cTtMvG
- WhatDaPhuk: http://bit.ly/am4C27 #Equality #PillowFuckers
- WhatDaPhuk: I'm starting to think @berryjunkies is right. Fuck these crappy routers. They burn out faster than high school stoner during 3rd period.
- WhatDaPhuk: http://www.whatdaphuk.com/face-down/
- WhatDaPhuk: "Nah, there weren't really eighty-eight of them. They just called themselves "The Crazy 88."
Facebook Status
- Josh I've come to the conclusion that Johnny, from the Karate Kid, is a much better person than I could ever be. He lost his girl, his All Valley Karate trophy and was literally kicked in the face. But despite it all, Johnny wanted to personally hand Laruso the trophy and tell him he is “alright.” I would have had my Cobra Kai homies shank him in the parking lot and jack his iPod. But that’s just me. March 11, 2010
- Josh "Um...I don't think you can do that. In fact, why am I listening to tax advice from you?!" March 11, 2010
- Josh "Relax and take notes, while i take tokes of the marijuana smoke" #RIPBIG. March 9, 2010
- Josh Dear Facebook: Please stop asking me to "reconnect with" my dad. You sound like a therapist. Please stop asking me to "say hello." I already have a jewish mother. I don't need this shit from you, too. March 6, 2010
- Josh "you send 4 million emails a day; you can't send me one?!" March 3, 2010
- Josh J.Lo wearing day-glo and a halo made of play-doh. March 2, 2010
- Josh Office Moving Day. March 1, 2010
- Josh Thank God for Sushi...and the Japanese. February 27, 2010
- Josh I’m sorry for being an asshole. I did it for the red Rigma jacket. February 26, 2010
- Josh By joining twitter, the Dalai Lama has legitimized the simple micro-blogging service as a powerful, worldwide media and personal connection platform. The Dalai Lama has also proven the notion that he is just as narcissistic and simply as "full of shit" as the rest of us. February 25, 2010
- Josh To the guy growling at the kiosk in the t-mobile store, thank you. Your pirate like growling and violent shaking of demo phones made my day slightly better. February 24, 2010
- Josh Damn dude, you look like your dog just died :'(. February 24, 2010
- Josh Welcome Back, Kobe! February 24, 2010
- Josh That ShamWow guy totally lied. The SlapChop fucking sucks! February 23, 2010
- Josh So that was about as entertaining as Google Wave. February 22, 2010
Archives
Digg.com
- The Three-Story Washing Machine
- 'Underwear Bomber' Could Not Have Blown Up Plane
- The Last Person on Earth--What Would You Do?
- Top 5 Greatest ‘Final Fantasy’ Characters
- Don't breathe on it! World Record House of Cards (PICS)
- Is that a pair of boobs on your head or... um...? [+Video]
- Lehman report blames execs, auditor
- New Site Unmasks Chatroulette Players
- Feds: TSA Worker Tried to Sabotage Terror Database
- How soon is now? Pre-order timing for iPad confirmed, 5:30am
Hollywood Tuna
- Jessica Simpson Gives Us A View March 12, 2010
- Whitney Port’s Long Legs Hit The Catwalk March 12, 2010
- Elle Macpherson’s Supermodel Leather Pants March 12, 2010
- Hollywood Tuna’s AmaTuna Moment – Sexy Girls Taking A Shower March 12, 2010
- Amber Rose Is Freeking Me Out A Little March 12, 2010
- Daily Tuna March 12, 2010
- Layla El Picture Moment March 12, 2010
- Stacy Keibler Is Out Of My League March 11, 2010
- Canned Tuna March 11, 2010
- Michelle Branch Is Inked March 11, 2010
Spam Blocked
Stereogum
- Phaseone – “Want You Back (Nite Jewel Remix)”
- Woods – “I Was Gone”
- Reading Rainbow – “I’ll Follow You” Video
- Fredrik – “Milo” (Stereogum Premiere)
- Moon Duo – “Killing Time” Video
- Dominique Young Unique – “Show My Ass” Video
- Oh No Ono – “Eleanor Speaks (Caribou Remix)”
- Strokes Confirm Lollapalooza 2010, LP Coming September
- Here We Go Magic – “Collector”
- HEALTH – “In Heat (Javelin Remix)”

