Hate is a pretty strong word. I fucking hate Asher Roth. Why in the world is Steve Rifkin committed to promoting a less than mediocre “college rapper?” I bet I could I walk into any college dorm and find 10 white, suburban jews with better skillz than Asher Roth. Hot Kizzle must be suicidal every time he hears this douche bag on the radio.

I watched this bumbaclot perform on Jimmy Fallon with the Roots as his backup band. Black Thought looked so bored. Asher Roth isn’t a musician. He isn’t a lyricists. He isn’t a poet. He isn’t hyphy. He’s a 22 year old douche bag that is unbelievably lucky. He is living the dream for absolutely no reason.

Now Asher is responding to beef with Spencer Pratt. Congrats, Asher. You made me side with Speidi. You aren’t just the worst “rapper” in the world, you are the worst person.

Here’s the response. Nice beat…kinda sounds like Jay Z’s DOA.

“you know I move my troops to keep trooping, we start a revolution”

Asher Che Guevara Roth…this fucking idiot is more delusional than cap and trade.

Socialism woo hoo! Let’s hear it for .21%

“You’re not the voice of this generation of this decade…with all the auto tuning on your records you are barely the voice on your own albums.”

According to my brother, the brooklyn king of space roaches, I am a super douche. I am not just any douche. I am the a combination of Criss Angel and Jared Leto. I guess I am pretty self-deprecating and masochist because I find it pretty funny. I’m pretty damn proud of it. It’s doucharific!

Update: I am now the proud owner of crissleto@super-douche.com

Everyone that attemps to see Douche Blaine perform his non-magic trick is upset by the fact that Blaine isn’t actually hanging there for 60 straight hours. He takes about 3 breaks per hour. This has to be the worst “trick” of all time.

David Blaine and Criss Angel need to have a douche off. They should make each other disappear, forever. Since neither one of them is an actual a magician, Angel will most likely set his hair on fire and scream into the camera, while Blaine climbs a telephone tower and stands there for 45 minutes.

The only thing these two have successfully made disappear is my love for magic. It’s a shame that Copperfield is busy coercing women to his island and is no longer interested in yearly specials.

So now we are stuck with these two. At least bring back Gob Bluth.

“These aren’t tricks, Michael…they’re ILLUSIONS!”