Tag Archives: Movies

Saw It Hated It

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This past year I took the easy way out and said I hated every movie that I saw. Well that’s not exactly true. I liked a few of them. However I hated most, especially the movies everyone claimed to love.

Horrible Bosses is one of the worst, most unfunny movies I have ever seen. It’s a poorly developed story with pseudo characters that try to kill each others bosses. Jennifer Aniston looked great, and that’s the only thing I liked in the biggest “comedy” of the year. I didn’t laugh once, both in the theater and at home.

Bridesmaids wasn’t as bad as Horrible Bosses but it was pretty horrible itself. When the best part of your movie is grown women shitting in the street while wearing an expensive wedding dress, do I even need to continue my explanation?

Hangover 2 was widely dismissed by most as just a darker repeat of the first. Enjoyable, due to our love for Todd Phillips and the cast, but definitely not nearly as likable. It wasn’t till I watched again that I realized it’s actually a terrible movie in disguise. It’s mean spirited and lacks any humor on its own. All of the “jokes” are self references to the first movie. I have high hopes for the third one because anything will be better than that piece of poop.

So that’s what I clearly remember hating. As for liking, I remember Attack the Block & Harold and Kumar 3D. The former was an awesome take on an urban (london) alien invasion movie. The latter was just perfect stoner movie fun. That’s honestly the only movies I can remember liking the whole year. I have yet to see Hugo & Dragon Tattoo. I saw Moneyball last night so I will consider that a mediocre like of 2012. I saw Mission Impossible 4 on Jan 1st so it counts as my 2012 worst movie of the decade but I’ll probably block it out by this time next year. Anyway…

Since I can’t be remembering shit and hate everything, here’s Quentin Tarantino’s movie picks of 2011.

Quentin Tarantino’s Top 11 2011 Movies

1. Midnight in Paris
2. Rise of the Planet of the Apes
3. Moneyball
4. The Skin I Live In
5. X-Men: First Class
6. Young Adult
7. Attack the Block
8. Red State
9. Warrior
10. The Artist / Our Idiot Brother (tie)
11. The Three Musketeers

Best of 2010

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We all know that 2011 doesn’t officially start until the WDP 2010 Best Of List is complete. And in that case it’s going to be 2010 forever… but here’s a quick shot at it. I know I left out a bunch of categories like books (i cant read), art, concert/shows, babies…

Movies

  • 5. The Town
  • 4. Black Swan
  • 3. Runaway
  • 2. Inception
  • 1. Social Network


Albums

  • 5. Thank Me Later
  • 4. Phrases For The Young / Earl
  • 3. Recovery
  • 2. Radical/ Bastard
  • 1. My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy


Tweeters

  • 5. @prettyh8mchine / @kimmerbelle10
  • 4. @fatjew / @jensenclan88
  • 3. @DamienFahey / @RustyTrombone88
  • 2. @fucktyler
  • 1. @jordanrubin


Food

  • 5. Umami Burger / Houstons
  • 4. Momo Sushi
  • 3. Empanada Factory
  • 2. Bay Cities
  • 1. Kogi BBQ

I’m going to try to add categories as I think of them but i think we all know it’s time to consider 2010 so last year and move the phuk on.

3 Movies; 1 Weekend

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  • Up

    Up

    I’m not a huge fan of 3D movies. I am still not quite sure why a technology once popular in the 80s is the big rage right now. Disney seems pretty committed to it. Peter Jackson just said he isn’t making another non-3D movie. James Cameron’s long-awaited Avatar is going to be 3D. I find 3D to detract from the movie, not enhance. With that being said, Up was better than I expected. The little cartoon at the beginning with the storks and clouds had nothing to do with the movie but it was cute. The movie was great. Any movie with talking dobermans and pit bulls is going to win me over. The story was a bit of a tear-jerker but overall I liked this movie.

    I give Up 4 blunts of master kush.
    bluntbluntbluntblunt

  • Whatever Works

    whatever-works-movie-poster

    My parents are huge Woody Allen fans. I grew up watching Hannah and Her Sisters…although I can’t tell you much about that movie now. I am not much of a fan and I find his personal life to be almost as disturbing as Michael Jackson. I wanted to see this movie because of Larry David and Evan Rachel Wood. Evan has been on my radar ever since Thirteen. She was amazing in this film. Her acting and beauty were enough to make this movie enjoyable. Larry David had his moments. Unfortunately this movie stretched his character and he just isn’t a good enough actor to make it work. The plot was very loose and I am still not exactly sure of the overall message. Larry’s dialog seemed very contrived and underdeveloped for a genius. A genius of his caliber (quantum physicist) would be using words that I don’t be knowings. Overall, there were some great jokes, and Evan was half naked the entire movie. That works for me. I am also unsure why this movie needed to be 3D. This is the last time I bring 3D glasses to a movie theater.

    Larry David and a half naked Even Rachel Wood gets 4 blunts of purple gods gift.
    bluntbluntbluntblunt

  • Twilight

    twilight-movie-poster

    I went into this movie knowing it wasn’t for me. I didn’t expect much. But I’ve seen other Catherine Hardwicke movies (Thirteen) and I’ve liked them. I expected this to at least be a decent a movie. It made enough phuking money that the production value shouldn’t look amateur. What was up with the shaky camera and constant blue tint? I get that she was trying to create a Washington gloom, but come on. This movie had more of a blue glow than that night I took 10 viagra.

    I watched this movie for 2 reasons: #1 K Stew…and she was good. She looked good and acted well. But it wasn’t enough. I was bored after the first 20 minutes. The #2 reason was to keep current in today’s pop culture. Kids…I’m disappointed. This movie was crap. You should all feel ashamed. Vampires shine like diamonds in the light??? LOL..if this movie wasn’t gay enough…wow. So now there are going to be at least 2 more. I don’t think I can sit through anymore of these. The vampire wants to kill her but he won’t, cause he loves her. So she loves him. Isn’t that just so romantic.

    This piece of shit movie gets no blunts. Even though Kristen Stewart gets a few blunts for just being hot, this pile of shit still winds up with nothing.

Summer Movies

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I’m going to make a real effort to see all of these movies, in the theater, this summer. I posted a while back that I find myself genrally enjoying a move more when I can’t text, IM, facebook, tweet, get a blumpkin…you get the point. Here are the movies I am giddy as a school girl waiting to see:
  • The Hangover (saw it in NY, phuking HILARIOUS)
  • Public Enemies
  • Bruno
  • Inglorious Basterds
  • Transformers
  • Whatever Works
  • Star Trek
  • T4
  • Up